Poem for #11

Your music cleared a space within me
Where you fit perfectly
I demanded your exclusivity
I had to wait

The dark green monster rose within me
When I saw you with Christine
I confronted you and stole you away
You were willing

I had never witnessed time freezing
Until you chose to kiss me
I asked you to repeat it the first time
To remember

We rode on a wave of innocence
Poetry and pure lust
Timidly, our bodies touched each other
Never enough

We snuck kisses wherever we could
Heavy desire for more
The tension was pulsing between my hands
A fearfulness

The temptation to go all the way
To put a seal on our love
We ached with poetry in those moments
Couldn’t do it

My frustration grew heavy and dark
You recoiled into yourself
I physically demonstrated my rage
Left you with scars

You began to fail at everything
The disaster was brewing
Forced to move away and distance yourself
I cried so hard

For two long months you left the country
Every day was slow for me
I feared what would happen when you came back
All sleepless nights

When you returned you didn’t call me
I knew then it was over
But I needed confirmation from you
To hear your voice

The phone call from you that ended it
Was short, quiet and too cold
I could see my heart fall into pieces
I was speechless

I organized your birthday party
Though you didn’t want me to
I sat on a couch, completely ignored
In tears, heartbroke

I walked into the room where you were
Engaged in conversation
All my deep pain showed itself violently
I was kicked out

One month later you were with Christine
I was furious and hurt
I tried to make you jealous one day
A small false show

I ended up marrying that guy
Whose love I flaunted to you
You ended up marrying someone else
And now, a baby

We finally met on pleasant terms
In our creativity
There is a pleasure in our memories
My first heart break